Monday, January 11, 2016


The lowest low won’t leave you there. You will see a high point again. We all struggle, at some point, trying to figure out what we’re here for. It isn’t that we have no purpose or are lacking deep sparks of inspiration. It’s just that at any given moment, we can fall into a spell of sadness. When someone passes whom you admired for their amazing humanity and humility, you can’t help but feel a void. Where will that love come from now? The answer is that you will create that love, even if you don’t know it yet. You have been touched by another life traveler and they have rubbed off on you FOREVER. The pieces of them you admired and held tight to become a piece of you. Perhaps you start to do the same things they did for the world or perhaps you just find your own way to spread the kind of joy they did.

Sadness doesn’t always come in loss, however. This is the mystery of life – why am I sad when I have it all in the palm of my hand? There’s not always a clear cut, crisp answer for you, but I have to believe that you need to feel whatever has come your way. Why would it be knocking at your heart if not to have you open up and let it sit down for tea and teach you something? So often, we are told not to answer the door or to kick out this visitor as soon as it sits down and reveals a bit of its intention. Truth is, we really need to have the "tea." We need to hear all the emotion has to say. It’s going to reveal a greater piece of ourselves and help us to heal or even just embrace who we are. It can get messy and it may hurt, but what a gift to feel such a magical mix-up of emotions. To feel at all is a gift. So open the door.

On a day like today, it seems quite obvious the reason for sadness. A musical legend has succumbed to cancer without ever letting on he even had the disease. It’s like a crazy realization that for 18 months he was suffering without the world knowing. That makes me sad. And then, it makes me feel very much in awe of a person who could keep something that monumental to himself. On his terms till death and well, that is pretty powerful stuff. What emotions must he have felt? Knowing he didn’t have much time, but managing to gather more pieces of inspiration to share with the world. He gave us the most amazing final farewell. 

I have been told throughout my life that my emotions would be a hindrance. My tangibility of what I felt and how often I did feel would in some way be the death of me.  All sorts of people throughout my days have said “You’re too sensitive” or “Stop your tears” or "Are you serious?" I have thought of myself as different and strange for feeling each and every emotion in one single day. I can literally go from crying to laughing. I will cry if someone harms a bug or when a trinket of my past gets broken or when I see a girl sitting on the curb in tears because she’s just been in a small car accident. She’s fine, car’s fine, but I cry for her and all she has to go through. I used to believe that was completely irrational or unacceptable by society because that’s what I’ve been programmed to believe. Be strong, buck up and just don’t ever let them see you cry are strong messages this world feeds us. The thing is – the world is lacking empathy. Feeling for others – REALLY feeling for other beings. I’ve got an abundance of it and I’m not going to change that. I'm sensitive not TOO SENSITIVE. I will not stop my natural feeling and if that means tears, so be it! Yes, I'm serious. I do not question your feelings so give me some grace and kindness when I feel. 

Today I’m blue. That’s not sexy. That’s not positive. That’s not my best foot forward. Still, that’s the truth. Today, I’m feeling down, lost and completely emotional. It’s okay. Everyone gets sad, down, or completely loses it. If more people allow themselves these lows perhaps more emotionally healthy people we would all be. I’m on a quest to feel what I feel. I want to be healthy. I want to be authentic. I have been doing some major work on me and I really expected to discover I needed to tone down my emotions in order to be a better person. What I discovered is exactly the opposite. Embracing myself and being a happier person can only be possible when I embrace the flows of emotions in my life. They are part of me and I don’t need to change them.  

Here’s to feeling what you feel and owning your emotions
Let them come in and go out like waves in the ocean
Don’t wallow or let them overtake your entire life
But know that a sad spell is completely all right
Even when you have everything you’ve ever wanted
There can be unaddressed skeletons in your closet
Let them come in and get you through it
Healing, light and peace will be all they emit
Embrace your human elements which include those feelings
Work through every one so it’s not your happiness they end up stealing
Feel and send out as much love as you can to those most closely affected
All alone in grief or doubt or pain, but you can show them we are all connected
Connected by our emotions and our empathy…
I feel for you… Do you feel for me?