Unplug

This year I wanted to make a more concerted effort in every aspect of my life. My plans were to continue with school - take the hardest classes now (speech, ugh) - and really work on myself. Mind, Body, Spirit is where I needed more aim to be, since I mostly worry about what everybody else needs or feel anxiety, pain, sadness about what everyone else is going through. Well, I haven't been doing so well with my goals... It's going to be April in a few days and I have yet to focus on myself FULLY. I have been walking and going back and forth with dieting (life long struggle), but I'm just so unsettled in my spirit. I haven't been able to put my finger on what's troubling me until a light bulb went on this week. 

My focus and drive are there for everybody else, but me. I'm the greatest supporter, helper and if you ask me to do something, it's rare that I'll say "No." Trouble is that there are people who know this and take advantage. At first, I feel great about it, I'm helping someone, but then it snowballs and all of a sudden the asking gets constant and then when I finally do get a "No" to come out of my mouth, I feel mean or rude. Not only do I feel mean, but the person I said "No" to, gets offended, and says, "Are you okay? You’re not acting like yourself?" Myself... What have I been doing about myself? I don't value my time or myself at all. I am proud of my accomplishments this last year and ongoing and I feel that I am a great asset to any group because I'm smart and organized, but as a human I don't respect me. My time should be as valuable as everybody else's, but I've been a pushover for so many years that even I don't believe my time matters. This is a huge revelation, maybe even a breakthrough, because now I see exactly where I've been making my mistakes. 

Watching an episode of A Different World (Streaming on Netflix now - Hallelujah - such a great show) there was this gal Kimberly who had too much on her plate, but she got a day planner and she assured her roommates that she would be able to handle it all. She said, "Each minute has a purpose," and it hit me, right then, that there are so many minutes of my day that have no purpose! So much of my life is spent online finding inspirational messages, reading through Facebook posts, watching movie trailers and keeping up on all the latest. I like to be "in the know" - someone who can tell you all about world events, music, movies, sports and more. I like keeping relevant and staying in touch with what everyone is doing, but it's really not adding value to my life. The minutes I tend to regret are the ones where I was idly looking at Pinterest or watching videos on YouTube that kept leading me farther down the rabbit hole. Those times when I went online for "just a minute" and somehow two hours had passed me by. I try to imagine life without the internet, but lucky for me I don't have to just imagine it, I lived it. I think back to grade school and even high school and if you wanted to see what people were doing, you went out into the world and went for a bike ride or had your parents drop you off at the mall. You saw people in the flesh and you enjoyed each other's company. The more and more time I spend behind a screen, the less comfortable I become in a group of people. 

I realize now that I have a few issues to iron out. 1) I need to see my time as valuable. 2) I need to stop pleasing people (which most likely will come once I value myself and time) 3) I need to get back to a simplistic life. I really need to take a step back and re-evaluate how I spend my time. I took a "Time Management" course at the beginning of March and our assignment was to log our time for 3 days and then evaluate what we logged. I logged over 6 hours of television watching in 3 days. I also logged a lot of walking - 5 hours in 3 days, but I realized then that my television watching was more than my outdoor life. It made me sick to be honest. I love media, film, theater, music, and television - all the glorious arts! Still, my "keeping up" with all that is causing me to lose a much more important piece of me - creating. I want to be a writer, film-maker, director someday. Those are my latest dreams and yes, one must study, but it is much more beneficial to get out there and learn by falling down. My time journal also showed how much of a routine life has gotten to be. Wake up, go to work, walk at lunch, come home, watch TV and go to bed. Wake up and repeat. I am not a hamster and this merry-go-round is not what I dreamed for myself. 

So, what do I plan to do about it? Well, luckily this morning I stumbled upon a preview for May I Be Frank - a documentary about a man who was lost, overweight and needed a new lease on life. (Check it out - so great http://mayibefrankmovie.com) All I watched was the preview - the extended one - and I was turned into a blubbering fool. Sobbing at my desk and thinking I feel exactly like he did and look at him now! Why can't that be me? Well, I am so over the "WHY"s in my life and the "What If’s," that I'm ready for drastic change. Be it known though that I am a great STARTER. I have ideas and plans for days. I get gung ho about something and it's awesome for 2 whole weeks and then... I quit. Sometimes slowly easing my way back to how it was before, but other times just completely throwing in the towel. It's horrible for my self esteem to try and fail so often. I feel that I just keep adding layers and layers of self loathing on top of me because I try and fail so often. Some philosophers have told me that it is noble to have even tried at all. So, I try to take that with me, but usually the self loathing overpowers the trying factor. 

I need to change. I need to take 30 days, full force, and create a different life for myself. They say (who the hell are they? LOL) that if you do something for just 28 days, you'll turn it into a habit... so why not try for an entire month? This is what I plan to do - take a month where I am solely and 100% focused on ME. Sounds horribly selfish and as I typed it, I got a twinge in my face and my nose scrunched up a bit. Worry about ME? Self serving, egotistical maniac!!! Not at all... I have done some things in life that I carry with me as regrets or baggage and I really need to open up and forgive myself. I have been struggling with my weight for the last 11 years of my life and I really want that to no longer be an issue for me. I need to approve of myself and be there for me more in life. I'm a strong girl with a ocean of emotion inside and though I can take a lot on the outside and push through the hard bits of life, my internal being needs me to care for it, stand up for it and add value to each moment of my life. 

So what exactly do I mean? Well, from April 1st to April 30th of 2015, I will be unplugging. I will completely signing off from Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, etc. A couple times this year, I tried going "off the grid" which for me really just meant keeping my phone away from reach and not logging onto Facebook at work. The longest I went was 2 1/2 weeks, but I snuck a peek here and there. I am addicted. I'm self aware enough to know that I have a huge problem. The distraction of social media is a huge barrier in my life. I don't need to be in the know all the time. I do not need to post what I just ate or who I'm with - nobody needs to know. It's this strange fear that if I don't post for long periods of time then I somehow don't exist. That's ridiculous, but it's the true feelings I have. If I don't tell something about myself today, then I'm somehow less valid than the rest of the world. Still, I have Facebook friends that rarely post and they are real and matter to me. My logic is getting fuzzy and when that occurs in my life, I realize there is a problem. I am addicted to my phone, to social media and staying relevant. For 30 days, I will not be tied to my phone and hopefully after that time, I will have created a new habit for my life. 

I am going to train for a 5k. 3.1miles? - That's nothing! Seems small, even to me, but I'm a walker not a runner. So, my goal for the month of April is to train to run a 5k. I have downloaded an awesome guide from Shape Magazine on interval training as well as how to incorporate rest days and strength training. I purchased a Balance ball to help with core exercises and I've got Jaeger bands to help me gain some arm strength as well! (Shout Out: http://www.jaegersports.com/) I have started a great program called Juice Plus which is going to help me on the eating side of things and overall health. Small steps, daily small goals and I think I can achieve a life change. 

I'm 34 years old and I feel so young inside my creative mind, but there are so many instances when my lack of courage and my physical stature holds me back. I'm tired of feeling limited. I plan to put a purpose behind every moment. I'm not going to fall asleep to the television, but to some literature that will move me and inspire me. I'm no longer going to itch to see what's trending unless that means taking a walk downtown to see what outfits are in the store windows or heading to Boo Boo Records to see what music is popular. There's distance between me and life and my passion projects. I want to create things and I find so many things distracting me from doing so. I've created such a beautiful space in the world with my amazing man Mister Paul, but I'm not making the very most of it. It's all on me. So, for a little while - at least a month - I am going to unplug from cyber space and plug back into the world around me. There's so much to see and do and create. I can't wait to see what comes from a month unplugged and I'm excited to get started... So now you know what's going on with me... maybe a little too much information, but I've always been an open book. Here's to making my book a little more balanced where my body, mind and spirit are concerned... 

I believe it's best to share what you're going through 

Cause then and only then, might you help someone just like you 

And what a glorious gift to give 

Bring to light what others have hid 

Nothing self righteous about it - just trying to show some humanity 

Life is full of so many components, why leave out the insanity? 

Weaving through the stages best as we can 

Constantly re-routing and changing best laid plans 

That's what life is 

That's how we grow 

Don't keep it all hid 

Let it out, let it show... 

THANKS FOR READING AND ALWAYS BEING SO SUPPORTIVE!!! 

I would love to hear your goals, life changes, comments or stories in the comments section below... 

Talk to me... As Fraiser Crane would say, "I'm listening..."

Numbers

       

        We read headlines. "12 dead at the hands of terrorists." "3 dead and 140 people injured at the Boston Marathon." "The nation mourns the loss of 20 children who attended Sandy Hook Elementary." "2,996 people perish when two planes crashed into The World Trade Center." Over and over again we hear numbers. Occasionally, we will get to hear stories and see the life behind the number, but mostly we hear the totals. People are reduced to numbers and getting the story out there as fast as possible is why. The News has become so instant and each network is competing to bring the story to the people fastest and somewhere along the line, we lose sight of humanity. That is until the horror is over and television specials get made about the heroes and good-doers. Those who raced to help or those who died trying to. You hear how amazing a select few of who perished were, with highlights of their lives and legacy. Still, most of the time we are dealt numbers and a lot of the focus is also thrust upon who is to blame. Twenty four hours a day you can turn on some news outlets and watch as they hunt for the people who committed these heinous crimes. The lives of the masked men are on a reel and commentators start to go through their background and what their motivations were. They get their fame. Their motivation was to cause a stir and get known for their criminal actions. Way to go news outlets - you're feeding right into their motivations. 
      Our societal need to know every detail has actually made most of us numb. We hear numbers and we say a prayer and thank the lord that our families are okay. For the most part, society moves along. Yes, "the show must go on," but what will it take to really hit home for the masses? As you watch people in coffee shops and listen as they skim over the newspaper you hear things like, "So tragic." or "I can't even believe it." And then they go off to the grocery store, gas station, to their jobs or back to normal life because it didn't happen there and so their world isn't affected in a sense. 
      As a very sensitive person, I am often affected by things that some would think I'm crazy for caring about. It's just the way my inner make-up is... Still, so often you hear people say, "if you worry with all that goes on in the world, you wouldn't be able to get out of bed in the morning." It's true, there's so much injustice and yet we get up, we get dressed and we go out into the world hoping to shine some little spotlight of hope out into this world. Now I know that no matter how much I want it to, the world can't stop every time something horrific happens in the world. I just wish there were better outlets or more meaningful ways for these horrible news stories to come to light. I wish instead of putting the newspaper in the recycle bin and heading off to Yoga, we could take a moment and think of each and every life that is no more. A person. A human life. A soul full of dreams, attached to a family and circle of friends is gone. Not 12, not 3, not 20 and not 2,996. Each and every one. Think of everything your life is made up of: goals, plans, siblings, parents, cousins, children, jobs, co-workers, significant others, projects, pets, dreams, school, etc... So many layers to a person and all of that is what was taken. 
      Even as I say this, I'm moving along with my life. Yesterday 12 were killed in Paris, France for speaking their mind through cartoon. There was a crime against freedom of speech which took 12 beautiful souls away from this Earth. Still, I am here working (well blogging between phone calls) and I am breathing. Yet it is ever present in my mind. I can't get it out of my head what went down yesterday. It hurts and I want to cry every other second and well to some - that's not normal. I can't help the way I feel things and I don't expect the world to feel as much as I do. Nor do I feel like some kind of special breed having feelings of this caliber. I just wish that the society we live in would stop creating such numbness. I believe that the cycle of numbness is the reason for more violence. One grows numb to what a life is and sees it as 1 of 12 and maybe he's angry, feeling jilted or dealing with some sort of mental illness and sadly another news story is born. 
      When you hold life as a precious commodity, you just want everyone to have the chance to make something of it. We are all given the same gift and when someone gets their book condensed, you wish they would have been afforded more chapters. Especially, when you're blessed enough to keep writing your story. That's what life is for, to be lived until your story is over, whenever that may be. None of us know when that day will come and so like I said before, "the show must go on." We all must find a way to keep moving forward and the crucial reasons are three-fold. One, we cannot let evil win. If we all sat down in our tears and agony, the world would stop and more chaos would ensue. Two, we must live in honor of those who perish. When someone passes, I often think about their plans. What they were going to do tomorrow or next year. Everyone has plans and their plans were so wrongfully cut short. Keep your plans with them in mind and life a good life. Three, fear cannot follow tragedy. So often we become fearful that something similar could happen to us. We start to change our walking routes or schedules to ensure the mere possibility won't be in our midst. As soon as change because of fear happens, Evil has won. Persistence and making statements like "Not Afraid," that's what squashes Evil's efforts - no matter how hard it might be at first. 
      Fear. It is Evil's best friend and its cloud is dark and mighty and loves to cover beautiful things. The randomness of horrible occurrences make it easy to be full of fear. Bad things happen all the time and to good people. There is no equation or pattern to it and so you cannot let fear be a constant in your mind. When fear tries to infiltrate, close your eyes and remember those who were not afraid. Those voices who held their own and took a stand for something. Even as I type here and let my opinions flow out of me, I feel fear creep up into my mind. "Hey you there, you know that someone could take what you have to say the wrong way, don't you?" And I stop briefly and then brush it off and say "So be it." When you let yourself be silenced or your world be changed just to accommodate fear, Evil has won. 
      As we all walk down the path of life, we can spare a thought here or there for those who can no longer move forward themselves. The only sense to be made out of any of this, is that life is both fragile and beautiful. Fragile because it can be taken away without a moment's notice. Beautiful because it is ours to make as bold as we can dream. So, I say next time you read a headline, seek out a person's story behind the "1 of 12" and say a prayer for them. A human soul is far more great than any number. 
     
          
       

Keep Your Focus

A photographer takes a picture of a beautiful single flower that grew through the concrete of an urban sidewalk. He focuses solely on that flower so that all you see is its vibrant colors, beautiful lines and awesome "I can grow anywhere" attitude. Now take that same flower and pan out to see it's entire surroundings and your mouth would be open in disbelief. How could a flower so beautiful and so perfectly unharmed, be on a street with condemned buildings, graffiti or trash? Well, it's all about your focus. Do you choose to see that flower for all it's worth or do you look at its surroundings and write it off? Where it happens to be at that moment really has nothing to do with its will or its beauty, does it? 

In life it's all about focus. Where do you let your thoughts lie? Do you see the beauty through the rubble or do you choose to bypass beauty just because the elements aren't ideal? So often we get caught up in what life is supposed to look like that we don't even see what's right in front of us as a blessing. We compartmentalize what it means to be happy, successful, beautiful, kind,etc. It comes in so many colors, shapes and sizes. Every person's moment of bliss is different and that is why the world has such a gorgeous rainbow of people. We all get to choose what our slice of __________ (fill in the blank) looks like. Pretty amazing! 

So, why does it take so long for some of us (I being one of that some) to let this click in our minds? Why are we so concerned with outside voices, forces and ideas that really have no clue what it means to inhabit these shoes? Why do we let ourselves get hurt, feel less than or question our inner voice? Well, I believe it's all about focus. Just because people look at you and create what you are in their mind based on your surroundings, looks or success level doesn't mean they are right. In those moments, you have to stay focused on who you really are.  It's tricky and there's no way I've even come close to mastering it, but it does require daily effort. You must silence those mean voices in your brain and create a new dialogue in your mind. For instance, you're catching up with someone you haven't seen in a while and they say, "You're still working there?!?!?!" in a tone that is clearly rude. You have two options here - you can think ill of them straight away and dismiss them or you can focus on you. Focus on the fact that you really love your job and question them back if you must, but don't wilt or make excuses for something you clearly love doing. So often we dumb ourselves down or act like our thoughts don't mean as much as someone older or seemingly wiser and it only does ourselves a disservice. If you go along with them and change your thinking to mirror theirs, you're also doing them a disservice. You're leading them to believe 2 things: 1 - that it's okay to talk negatively about your life and 2- that you feel something you actually don't. You've got to own your present state of being with a firm belief in it. You are relevant and everything that makes up your life matters! 

For this gal - yep, this girl typing away as she works at the job some deem below her... Well, this gal is at work on a Wednesday and she's writing. Yes, she's interrupted by answering phones and creating schedules, but see she's interrupted and not the other way around. Okay, let's get out of that third person rant. See I have a job where I have a lot of time to do what I love. I work hard and I'm always ready to get pulled back into the work, but for the most part I get to live in a land of writing. My greatest love affair is with words. How you can mold them to shape an entire scene. How you can rhyme them to get a point across in a more graceful way. Just now, as I type, I get goosebumps because I'm tapping into my word space. Thoughts are continuously bouncing around this brain and most of the time they come out in rhyming form, but every now and then I just feel compelled by an idea or vision and I have to rant. Blogs are amazing for this type of thought and so here it is... FOCUS. A small word with big intention. I heard that word and instantly got a vision of a beautiful daisy growing out of the sidewalk. I panned out in my mind and I saw a desolate, trash ridden and filthy city. With that image came inspiration and the entire first paragraph of this blog. 

Focus is the key to everything. When we allow ourselves to focus on what's important, we truly tap into ourselves. We have to keep that aim straight and we cannot let anything take our vision away. That's the struggle, isn't it? Take an astronomer, for instance, who's looking through his telescope up to the array of stars and possibilities. He's just found the exact star he was looking for when someone walks by and knocks his telescope out of focus. He's got to regroup and get realigned so that he can see what his eyes were locked on just moments before. It's certainly a setback, but it can be remedied. It's all a mind over matter scenario. In daily life, we let ourselves get pulled this way and that way to accommodate or be there for others. No, I'm not saying to stop being there for people or stop being kind because love and kindness are the heart of life. What I'm saying is you must find a way to keep centered and focused on your life's purpose all the time. To embody your reason for living, every single second. 

Now sometimes it's not 100% clear what exactly you were put here on Earth for. Sometimes you just haven't come across your passion yet and in that instance I say just be OPEN to everything. When you're not sure which way you're supposed to go, closed doors or stubborn views won't help you at all. You will just find dead ends which will in turn make you miserable. BE OPEN... There's nothing to lose! You could learn something or enjoy something. Give yourself a chance to find your passion! 

Now if you're like me, you can't seem to find just one passion to settle on. Yes, I feel passionate about many creative avenues. I am in love with singing, writing, and creating in various visual forms: painting, crafting, film making, etc... So, how do you FOCUS on just one? You have to choose the one that's pulling you towards it the hardest. There is one, you just have to get in tune with it. Then, set time aside and really envision the finished product. Personally, I want to finish my novel. Yes, I have many unfinished projects such as my paintings, my script, my poetry book, etc... But to try and tackle them all would be far too overwhelming.  So, I'm going to aim my strongest FOCUS on my novel. That's what is calling to me now and I'm going to follow that spark in my belly asking me to finish it. Unfinished bits make for a heavy conscious. Your mind starts to whisper, "you've got so much left undone... there's never enough time... what were you thinking starting all these things? you're never going to get anything done..." Quiet that voice that's trying to mess with you. Take the one thing and tackle it and then once it's finished, move onto another passion project that's calling you the loudest. That follow your gut thing is actually true. Your being will tell you what to do... you just have to be OPEN.  

Focus on that which will fulfill you. Focus on what matters at this very moment. Listen not to the negative nellies, but to that fire in your belly. Your being wants to get focused. It wants you to feel secure, self assured and at peace. It's all up to you to train your brain to treat you kind. We spend so much time striving to be kind to the outer world (which is so important, don't ever stop that!) and yet we neglect ourselves. Don't listen to anything that doesn't serve you. As Jason Mraz sings in the song Hello You Beautiful Thing, "My thoughts are all I got so I try to make 'em brave! And I know, I know, it's gonna be a good day!" Keep your thoughts brave! Always be YOU! Get focused! 

Human Inconsistency

White lies, fibs, omissions and misgivings are tools that some use to reduce the chance of hurting someone else's feelings. Not up to attending that lunch meeting, "I'm not going to be able to make it, I have to go to the doctor that day." When in fact there is no such appointment. You ask someone to come hang out and they never show. Text later: "I was sick. Sorry I missed it." When in reality they just needed a day to chill at home. The truth is that excuses are really hurtful if ever it is found out that the reasons given, were actually not 100% true. A good friend will ask, "How did it go at the doctor yesterday?" and then you fumble and you lie again, "They had to move my appointment" or "I rescheduled it because of (fill in blank here)." When it starts to unravel, that's when you hurt people. The lie is worse then just being up front and saying, "I don't feel like it." 

I love this quote by Mark Twain, "If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." It's so true. If you just live in truth, it's there, out in the open and you can just be. You don't have to reach for the script you wrote last week and try to adhere to that fake plot. You are at peace with your truth. Now I don't pretend to be some saint and yes I have had my fair share of fibs to keep from hurting someone else's feelings. I, as most people do, hate to hurt anyone's feelings and I want to be there for everyone, but as one person - it is impossible. 

The word, "No." is one that people cringe at and yet it is a tool that was added to our vocabularies for a reason. Boundaries are important. You must take care of yourself too. If you had a bad day or you're feeling down, you have a right to those feelings. We are here to serve a greater purpose to those around us. Giving is the name of the game, but when you feel in your gut that you don't want to do something, just tell the people around you straight up. Honesty is far better in the long run. As long as you are kind and well spoken, most people will understand. Those who don't understand, well that's on them and not on you. You have to be who you want to be which includes taking part in what you want to take part in. When you really look at the people around you, most of them do exactly as they please. So why aren't you affording yourself that same luxury? 

The human condition is ever changing, ever flowing and we weave in and out of practice. We decide we want to be honest, open and change. So, we embrace that way of life and it lasts for a week, a month, a year... Then, an uncomfortable circumstance comes up and we feel put in a corner and we go against our grain. This is because we are human and we make mistakes and very few things stay at the forefront of our mind. So much to do, so much to remember, so many ways to be that our center can occasionally fall into the shadows of life. Yes, we mess up and then we beat ourselves up because of it. We are so hard on ourselves. Some would say that we should be hard on ourselves because that is how we become better people. Others think we should give everyone a break. Truly so confusing to me as to what is right? Thus is the question of life, isn't it? There really is no right answer... 

There's an inconsistency to humanity. Kind people have the power to hurt people and sometimes do. Mean people have the power to be kind and sometimes are. There are people who say they couldn't hurt a fly and yet they are the first ones around the water cooler bad mouthing someone. If I'm not mistaken, just because you're not saying those words to the person directly, that doesn't mean it's not a form of hurting them. There are people who vow to be as honest as Abe, but then they turn around and tell you the most far fetched story to prove their point. If I'm not mistaken, that's lying! There are those who dislike it when you nag them about quitting one of their bad habits and yet they have no problem nagging you to move forward in your own life. It's along the same lines - if it bothers you when someone points out a flaw then why would you point out their flaws? If it's tit for tat then just own that, but realize it's a losing game and just mean. 

I am to blame in all these areas. Luckily I've seen and I'm still open to seeing the error of my ways. Honesty is my motto for 2014 and so far so good. I've always been an open person, but I want to be honest about my needs and wants and just say, "I don't want to," if that's my truth. People respect you more if you don't make excuses. Luckily when it comes to me, I'm happy to be an open book. If you want to know my flaws, I'll tell you. If my secrets will help get my point across, they quickly become truths and no longer secrets. Sometimes I may give too much information (TMI), but I don't care. I want to be open, honest, and true. I want to be seen as an open book because this is how you reach people. When you sit closed and guarded you learn nothing and teach nothing. 

I've been unkind and it hurt me more than any mistake I've made in my life. It sits as a reminder of how not to act if I should ever have the same situation arise again. When evaluating the circumstance, it all came down to youthful naivety and ego. When you trust, you can get hurt. When you are put down, you should just rise above and realize you're better than what is being said. Self esteem is important too. If you have none, the words of others become truth. Your brain latches on and tries to make you think they could be right. Whenever you're going through anything, you can't truly be objective and see from all sides. Once you get past it, learn the lessons and look back - you see so much clearer. Give yourself a break. I had to. I had to say, "You're human, you made a mistake. I forgive myself." There is no way to take it back so you have to move forward and learn from it. 

When you have a lot of different family units and an array of friendly circles, you encounter so many personalities and so many different views. The biggest thing is to stay consistent with your inner bell. We all have that inner feeling that let's us know, "Hey you, you're not being yourself." When you hear it - readjust, be mindful and be you. It's so easy to fall into the traps of being what everyone else is, but you can't - you are you. The best example of a person in my life who embodies this idea is my Brother. He is 100% himself, but he is so personable and kind that he can fit into any group of people. It's amazing to watch. His confidence of spirit, his amazing presence and ease in any situation is remarkable. He can engage with any age group and the way he holds his ground without ruffling any feathers is a gift. I admire him so. Drama free. 

Drama. We create every piece of it that enters our life. All that drama consists of is your reaction to a circumstance. How you feel, the way you speak about it, what you think and how you act - you have the power to be drama free. Drama is a time waster and a happiness eraser. It serves absolutely NO PURPOSE. So why are people dramatic? Well, perhaps they are actors/actresses and need to stay in character, but most people are dramatic because they are bored. Perhaps life is at a standstill and they embellish and fib to heighten life to a level of exciting. It's still lying. It's like the BIG FISH story. The fisherman holds out his arms all the way and says, "You should of seen it, I almost lost my pole, the fish had me fighting to reel it in. IT WAS THIS BIG." Then, you see the picture of him holding the fish and it was half that size. To most, the fact that he caught a fish at all, is great story and yet for some reason, he didn't think that was enough. We are all enough! Life, on its own, is amazing.  

There's also the daily dramatics. One thing goes wrong and you get angry or stressed and then everything spirals out of control. You dropped your coffee and then ripped your dress. You got a bad parking spot at work, you didn't get that promotion, you got a speeding ticket and so on and so on... If you let all those things become BIG things they will take over your day and sometimes even your week or month... The reason for that is you are putting negative energy into each issue that arises. You are sending out a message to the universe that you react to negatives. So, guess what, the universe is going to give you more negatives... It's the law of attraction. If you take on each setback with light and love, you will find yourself with more days that go right. TRUST ME! Drama free is such a happier place to be... 

That brings me to kindness again. Some drama stems from the mere fact that someone chooses harsh words instead of using kind words to get their point across. Like the expression, "Don't poke the bear!" We are all capable of pushing people's buttons - especially when it comes to people we know very well. Usually these people are the ones we hurt the most. We think, "they'll have to forgive me because we're always around each other." Still, there's nothing fair about that. If you constantly pick at a person, they will eventually growl - just like that bear did. It got poked one too many times and it finally had enough. I'm not saying that's a good way to behave either - you should nip any comment that hurts you in the bud and open up the dialogue so you can have a better relationship. So often we don't want to start a war or have tension when really it's worse if you don't say something because you're just holding onto it. Communication and kindness will equal peace and tranquility and that's what we're all after, isn't it? 

As I've said before, I merely write these things to get my thoughts out there, maybe start a conversation, and to instill these principles back into myself. I am not a preacher. I am a writer. I think, I feel, I write it all down in hopes of becoming a better person. Along the way if I touch someone or make someone think then I've got a little frosting on this cupcake. My goal is to be better and to keep thinking and speculating on how life is truly meant to be. I'm no expert, I'm no angel and I realize I am to blame in all the scenarios above. I take responsibility for all the flaws and imperfections of my soul because in them I can plant flowers of hope and change. May some of these seeds find their way into your garden...